Talking about Jesus in my Guinness Shirt

There is a woman with a thick accent that has been stopping by my door lately.  It's 9:30AM and the bell rings.  Nobody ever comes at this hour in the morning.  I thought it was going to be one of the handymen for another annoying routine maitenance check-up.  My peephole is obscured by a spring decoration hanging on the door, so I peered out the window and saw a woman's rear dressed in a long, flowery skirt. 

I open the door and I see my middle-aged friend with another woman (skirted lady).  She shoves a booklet in my hand, I look over my shoulder nervously at my two boys...running around naked in their diapers sagging with urine.  They had just woken up, and I hadn't changed them yet.  I kept glancing over my shoulder, I didn't want to be rude and slam the door in their face or say I didn't have time, but shit, those diapers really needed to be changed.

The woman with the accent then asks me if I think Jesus is the world's greatest hero.  And I nod my head in agreement "Yes, yes, of course."  I say.  She then proceeds to open her Bible and read a verse to me.  She asks me if I own a Bible.  I tell her yes, I have one on my Kindle.  Which wasn't a lie, I do...but mostly I use it for reference (lately, I've been using it to try to figure out the TV show LOST) and not for spiritual purposes.  I also wouldn't disagree with Jesus being a hero.  I believe that he was a real man in history, that did good things for people and encouraged them to live with morality.  Kind of like Mother Theresa.  I don't believe in the crazier parts of the Jesus story.

I believe in God.  But I don't consider myself a Christian...or a Jew, or anything else.  If I had to align myself with any church or religious group, it would be the Unitarian Universalists. 

Anyway, she thanks me for my time and I thank her for stopping by.  I say "oh, I have a question.  Where are you from?  ....your accent...?"  She laughs and says "Oh, I'm from Finland!"  I smile and say "Oh neat, I'm Norwegian."  She tells me Norway is the most beautiful country she's ever been to.  Then we smile and nod at eachother through an awkward moment.  She takes a long look at my green Guinness Draught shirt, and I suddenly feel self-conscious.  "Well...goodbye."  I say.  "Have a good afternoon!"  the women reply in unison.  And they were on their way.